Passover in South Florida

AKA western Tel Aviv...

There are at least 30 cars backed up at the guard gate trying to get into my mom's friend development. Lol.

I swear some days it is like a Seinfeld episode down here.

I am still at least 10 cars from the guard.

Passover

there is an old jewish joke that makes the rounds around the internet...

Short summary of every Jewish Holiday:

"They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat. "

 

unfortunately there is a lot of truth in the "let's eat" part....tonight starts the first major jewish food holiday since i got my band and hit restriction.   i am not too worried about sitting around the table and my food choices.  my plan is to enjoy a bite of every favorite food and i will be ok.   but the preparation for this holiday has me in that psycho-babble reflective mode today...

 

as i previously blogged about i am pretty sure my food addiction and obesity is directly connected to my need for closeness with my family.    i was the one in the family who my grandmother passed down all her traditional sephardic recipes to.   most of my childhood memories of my grandmother are actually in the kitchen.  and now that she has been gone for 12 years i have firmly placed myself as the holiday cook for the family.  in fact, last year when i flew up to new jersey for passover i took sephardic food on the plane with me since i was going straight to the seder from the airport.

 

so...last week my mom called me to ask me what "we" were doing for passover.   because i don't really obsess about what i am eating each day -- not to mention "next week" -- anymore i was kind of caught off guard.  of course, the question was what was i cooking at my house when i would host the seder.  when i told her i was really not thinking about passover this year she laid on the heavy jewish mother guilt.  try growing up with a greek jewish mother  -- she has the market on guilt....but i digress.... so, after we talked she talked to her good friend whose own horrible daughter was going to her mother-in-law's the first night --with the grandchildren to boot!  so we were able to finagle an invite to first night at my mom's friend house.  and i agreed to do second night at my house just for my parents.
 
well...you would think that would have gotten me off the hook from cooking every recipe of my grandmothers.  nope.   i have been asked to bring not one, but two sephardic pies tonight.  one is a spinach and feta pie and the other is an eggplant and feta pie (my favorite).   i told my mom that tomorrow night i am not making a big brisket and the traditional spehardic meat dishes.  usually i do a brisket, a meat/matzo pie, spinach and veal patties and leek and veal patties.   this year at my house i am only doing spinach patties, potato kugel and my grandmother's red rice (sephardim eat rice on passover).   i will also throw out a can of sardines as gefilite fish is not a traditional sephardic food (but a great protein rich and band friendly food -- btw). 
 
the point of this is not to go on and on about sephardic food porn but that i realize that food really is my connection to my family.  it is my "job" in the family.   and as i previously talked about both me and my parents are starting to feel that shift take place and, at least for me, it is very scary.   i talked about this in therapy last week.   one of my tasks this week is to try to find something else that will be our connection.  one of the ideas we talked about is maybe doing a family bowling night or something.  i don't know...bowling versus food...  lol.  i just don't know.
 
the next two days should be interesting as we sit around the table as a family....
 
oh and on another note...obviously god has it in for me this year.  i took today and tomorrow off work.   after the great weather this weekend i got all my prep cooking out of the way on saturday with the hope that i could go lay out by the pool this morning while the princess was at school.  nope.  not only did it rain...we had tornadoes in the area and flooding.   so now i am stuck in the house...lol... not funny.

goal for next year's pride...

so as i have previously posted about...i tend to think in 10 pound/one month increments.  part of this obsession is to think "ok in one year i will weigh XXX and this will be different..."

so today the pride parade during my favorite part -- Dykes on Bikes -- (lesbians on motorcycles) i thought...next year i will be a skinny bitch riding on the back of some hot chick's motorcycle!  (note to self: find a hot chick with a motorcycle this year)

i am in general not a big rainbow wearing lesbian.  but today i really had a great time.  it was a little muggy here in south florida, but not too bad.   it was nice to see friends, dance to good music and watch my sweet little daughter watch her first drag show and give her first dollar to a drag queen during a performance.   mama's girl is growing up....awwww.... you can kind of see this momentous moment in the cell phone picture to the left.   the little hand with the money is the princess.  we had to have a "talk" after the show when the drag queen took the mic and started talking in her real "man" voice.   at first the princess felt deceived that the beautiful lady" was really a man... but after i explained that boys can dress up and wear wigs too she was ok and just wanted a smoothie.  lol.

on the band front i was great with my eating.  probably could have drank more water...but the bathrooms at the park we nasty and i didn't want to have to keep using them.  yuck-o.

Pride NSV

South Florida Gay Pride today. Waiting for parade. I am sitting on curb and not worried how I will get up!

Haunting Fat Past

I know the picture doesn't make sense....I am sitting in a City Commission chamber for my former employer. I left here 6 years ago and for the 3 miserable years (really) I was here the lap table attached to the seats never went down.

It is down and there is space between it and my lap! At least something positive will come out of this little trip down nightmare lane....

that body...you know the one...

so shortly after i had my surgery a friend -- we will call her Hot Mess with an emphasis on the Hot -- came out to me and told me that a couple years ago she had the gastric sleeve.   so when i mentioned that to my friend Commando, Commando said: "i can see that.  she has that post-surgery body"....  now, i can't begrudge Commando because i knew *exactly* what she was talking about.   thin on the top between the shoulders.  illusion of straight down the middle (in clothes) and then wide at the hips and tummy.  

yep.  4 months post-op i am now sporting "that body"....sigh. 

WHY?  why does this happen?   why can i now wear an XL or 2X on top (compared to 4x) but that same top is tight at my belly?   why can't the weight come off the belly at the same time.   it makes no sense to me.

i hope i do not have this affliction forever.  i mean, seriously...i am a walking, breathing queen song...

i gave in to my whim....

today was free cone day at ben and jerry's.  as a quick sidebar... i was fired from the ben and jerry's in charlotte, nc when i was in college because i kept showing up to work in birkenstocks.  go figure....anyhoo...despite my early termination i have always remained loyal to the brand.   so who am i to let a little lap-band and ice cream fatwa stand in the way of free cone day 2010?  

i had made plans for me, the princess and a couple other people to go tonight.   it was like the chubby hubby stars had aligned themselves perfectly for me...easy street parking.  no line.  they invited us to come back in for more.  but i did not do it.  i did not even have one lick of the princess' vanilla ice cream.  i did not even steal one m&m off the top.  nothing. nada.  just sat out in the sun and relaxed.

so afterwards, i decided to reward myself and go down the street  from b&js and buy myself a necklace i had seen a couple months ago when i was a on date in the same area.   kind of a whim, kind of not.  i had told myself at the time when i reached 50 pounds band loss i would get it.  but then 54 pound loss came so easily i didn't really think much about a reward.  but today i decided it was fine time for a reward...so i went and bought myself this necklace.    not sure if you see the text but it says my tagline..."just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly".  i really think this is the tagline of my weight loss journey.  this metamorphosis is at time overwhelming and at other times just so much damn fun.

in other news...i think i may be losing some restriction.  if i feel hungry all day tomorrow i am going to get a fill.  i am hoping this is a just a weird fluke today. 

spring is here in south florida and i am at my peak.  i just love it.  in fact, i have scheduled myself off or half days for the next week and a half.   this weather is so good for my soul.

have a great night!